niche-less

Niche: 1. a recess or hollow in a wall, as for a statue, bust, or vase 2. a place or position particularly suitable to the person or thing in it 3. any small, specialized business market 4.b) the specific space occupied by an organism within its habitat

Niche-less.

That’s right and now I’ve said it.

“Arriving” is the lie, isn’t it?

Maybe all kinds of honest floundering is where it’s at.

Maybe it’s “lucky” for me that me and my ways aren’t beautiful

In an in-crowd, pretty and put-together kind of way.

I have been unsuccessful at stuffing inĀ neat and tidy boxes.

I’m sort of a mess.

(So I guess I have arrivedĀ somewhere. See “mess.”)

Maybe it’s its own niche,

But I don’t think so.

‘Cause really, none of us has “arrived.”

Leastways not with any permanence.

(Not yet.)

Gettin’ er done? No, not really.

Floundering around under the illusion of control?

All of us: no matter how well the illusion paints otherwise.

So why not be an honest – to goodness? – mess?

Maybe this is where the progress is.

Not in a drowning sort of way, but in a

stop-trying-to-keep-up-and-compare-to

kind of way that admits need and begs help and seeks direction

and admits not-knowing and looks and believes

that healing inward to healthy outward means looking upward.

Anyways, niche-less does preclude collecting dust.

(And I really hate dusting.)

Messy, yes.

Dependent on the direction of Another, yes.

But for whatever reason, He seems not to want any

Do Not Touch signs.

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