Hope

Seems an awful precarious vessel

By which would flow

You, or any part of You.

Even my wonder at Your goodness is

Too unreliable, too simple.

Part of and maybe the magic is

You’re to be hoped in:

No matter our fragility

Lack of dependability

Whimpering, stinking inadequacy.

You and all Your

Tendrils of light keep

Warming:

Teasing to hope.

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Blessedly Forced Reckoning


Shhhh…. He whispers.

With so many words

This breeze

Ailments-forcing-downtime

A rocked-jacked-up-unexpected-turn-of-events

Forced inactivity

This fragility I’m tempted to begrudge

Turns out’s my greatest asset

As it makes room

For all His goodness

That I temporarily forgot

In all my (quite-temporary-and-posing-as) capability.

Oh, Lord,

How majestic is

– Not just Your Name –

But Your way

You

Light as a feather

Heavy as a mountain

More besides and all the in betweens

Wild

Sweet

Huge

Complete

Staggered, lonely, and full am I

With such a God as You

You Are

And Everywhere

Help us see YOU

Premeditated Posturing


Nothin’ like my wretched to bring out yours.

And you may mind me saying,

But there’s nothin’ like your wretched to bring out mine.

I know you’re not trying to NOT know me,

But you’re not trying TO either.

It’s hard to hug so much premeditated posturing,

And I’m sorry I walk away disappointed in you.

I don’t know why.

Your refusal to know me

Is just another reflection of my own ugliness.

This isn’t all there is.

Praise His Name –

This isn’t all there is.

Bear with me,

I’ll bear with you and

Shed this outgrown itchy skin

For a fresh one

That gleams and shines

‘Neath the light.

Inviting, welcoming,

Ready and new for receiving all you offer, it’s

Impermeable to stings and scratches.

Forgive my absorption of your ugliness:

– please disregard it –

As if I didn’t have my own to be rid of,

I’ve gone and lazily let yours ooze through.

Like so much poison all our transgressions

May mingle and choke out the healthy

If we’re not careful.

I know better.

A better way

An excellent way

A less garment-like way;

One that doesn’t have to be changed nor shed

One that is rooted in – Who is – love and righteousness.

Who never tires, nor offends, nor spoils.

Who extends love to a thousand generations.

Make us so, Lord.

Forgive these petty (though still dire) offenses,

Be our love and

Thank You for Yours.


I’d be a well meaning but destructive spectator in this wide world of perils:

Free the butterfly from his cocoon

The spider from his molt

Quicken the buffalo calf from the wolves’ pursuit

Make all the carnivores vegetarians.

I’d upset the natural order of things in favor of less:

Less effort, less running, less power

Thereby weakening all things and

Have the place overrun.

Instead of shrinking and fearing all these threats,

I pray to meet them as He’s directed:

Be strong and courageous

Not lettuce leaf wilt

‘Neath what would challenge.

Head up, shoulders back, forehead like flint

May I take hold of a freely offered inheritance as

Little conqueror.

Rally

“Lacking in nothing”

Oh, the wonder of this –

This puny puddle

Rallies a little

A slack everything

Perks up with the suggestion

And thrills

To think

It possible

Reclamation

The fullness and

Scope of this

Gulf Stream life

And I’m right saturated and

Even bogged down while moved along.

Regardless of my desire for calmer (stagnant?) waters
I’m the mom

For all practical purposes

But all I feel is to be

“Like butter spread over too much bread”*

*Bilbo Baggins

All these children’s questions

Charge the particles

In my like-an-old-school-tv’s

Snowy insides:
Instead of jolting to life,

Every word

Zaps already taut and sensitive fibers

And this tired old battery sparks only to grinding.
Proof again

That mere machinations

Aren’t the source of life and

Just-function won’t sustain any of us.
Without the proper mechanic’s lifeblood to

Recalibrate all these lifeless moving parts we’re all just

Bound for the junk heap.
Overdue

I wheel myself in for inspection:

Open the hood

Expose the innards

Wait for His assessment.
It took me way longer to get here than it takes for Him to look.

Surprisingly gentle, thorough, and quick

He fusses with something (I don’t see what) and
I expect the damage report – as ever –

To be that this time I’ve ridden too far, too long

Without this scrutiny, this help, this exposure.

Instead, He bids me turn the ignition and

– Expecting dead space –

A deep resonant purr sounds instead.

Instead of more static misfires and sparks

A healthy hum of life and connection fires full and throaty.

Smiling

I shake my head in wonder and thanks and

Roll forward back into the stream

Anticipating a new horizon and steady current to

Carry me along, the Master Mechanic’s prints my map
Thank You, Lord.

Relief

A new peace descends
It’ll probably be displaced by some scurrying, unexpected,

Terrible trouble

But –

For this moment

Trouble, lofty pursuits,

“Grander” things

(Than savoring a bit of quiet)

Seem a little trumped up

Falsely grand

(a little silly?)

I don’t mean to judge

It’s just that

This new peace that’s descended

Seems enough to accomplish most anything

– Seems like everything –

Without lots of trying

And I do hope that this basking

Will serve to extend it

If even a little further…
Thank You, Lord.
Psalm 34:10

James 1:4